America's Next Top Car Salesman

I give up.  I love Natasha.  I can resist no longer the pull of her deluded optimism.  And her ability to be a dude.  I mean, I KNEW that Jaslene would be a convincing guy, b/c she has her own penis and stuff, but Natasha blew me away.  She's sad b/c all the other girls were dissing her about being a mail order bride.  Miss Ivy League Whitney was being especially nasty, but hey, it's working for her.  She's (perhaps pathologically) happy, back off.  And she misses her kitten.  Who doesn't?

Renee, bless her cold black heart, is still causing trouble, pointing out that plus size gals will never be on the cover of Vogue.  But seriously folks, she's right.  And that's okay.  Vogue is not Redbook.  It's Vogue.  It also will not feature ugly people on the cover. I can't really get up in arms about it.  But it did sort of signal that one of the outraged saftig gals was going home.  Diana, specifically, because even though she's pretty, she's not even smart enough to pretend she wants to be there.

ANTM continues it's "We lost all of our funding" theme by having the girls model for The House of Sears.  I really expected the prize for this challenge to be "You get to keep your outfit!" because it would cost them, like $30.  But, for absolutely free, they were able to make the prize extra camera time.  Way to save money!  Oh, and "Aphrodite's Box"?  Totally a strip club.  A skanky skanky strip club.

So, as mentioned, the big challenge was to have the girls made up as men and have them model with guys dressed as gals.  Dionne is a dead ringer for Chris Rock.  Freakily so.  Brittany is supposed to be an outdoor guy.  But they kind of get deer hunter and hippie hiker dude mixed up.  Jael  manages to "allow [her] soul to be captured" as a bohemian.  And still just looks like a gal with a moustache.  Renee is a rock star.  Or so she tells us.  Again, looks like a mean girl, not a guy.  Sarah is even less convincing as a...oh wait, is SHE the rock star?  Then what is Renee?  And then poor, doomed Diana, who is Dave Foley about 15 years ago.  She tells Jay she wants to be ANTM "just cuz".  Not a good sign.  Tyra doesn't really want a gal who isn't willing to kill for the position.  She really, really wanted to make Tiffany work b/c that girl would have cut a bitch that got in her way.

Plus Size Cage Match!  It comes down to Diana and Whitney and we know who comes out the other side.  So, we're down to this:

Jaslene--in the final three.  Won't win b/c she can't talk.  or eat.
Brittany--in the final three.  She's getting no edit at all right now, so I'm not sure what's going o there.
Dionne--final three.  Might take it b/c she has a real job so they don't have to feel bad when the model thing tanks
Jael--fun, but what is she still doing here? The Elite modeling agency woman said she'd not even let her interview.  Ouch.
Natasha--cannot pass the commercial episode
Renee--soon, someone will notice that she photographs Lisa-old and she'll be sent home.
Sarah--just not pretty
Whitney--Cover Girl's Queen Latifah position has been filled already.  By Queen Latifah.

Tags: antm top model