So today I went into the school when I dropped off the kids because I couldn't remember if it was my day to be a library lady. It wasn't, but I hung around and talked to the on-duty LL and another mom. Then a third mom came in and said that the heat was out in the basement and the lower elementary kids were freezing. I brilliantly suggested taking the lost-and-found bucket down there, letting cold kids rummage. So I went to the office, asked the secretary and then the principal if that was okay. Sure. So I did. And I went to every classroom, telling the teacher what I was doing. Saw and chatted with many people, both adult and child. Went to my car, where I noticed, in my reflection, that I had a glob of cream cheese on the end of my nose. Nice. People, if a person you are talking to has food on his or her nose, assume it is in error and point it out to him or her. thank you. Of course, I'm so wicked cool that now EVERYone is going to be trying to rock the Cream Cheese Nose. As if they could be as cool as me.
And on a related and more painful note. On the morning I took the kids to DC, I put on some pants that I'd been "airing" on the cedar chest. Always comfier on Day 2, right? So I belted them and thought, "ow." then I though "HOLY CRAP OW OW OW!" and yanked off my pants to find a friggin' WASP flopping around on the floor. I squished him with extreme prejudice and noticed that he'd gotten me twice. Asshole. It HURT. And then Ben and Lily started fighting and I couldn't say, "Could you just hold on for a minute b/c Mommy had a WASP in her freakin' PANTS" because neither of them would ever get dressed again. So I just screamed at them and then called Steve and cried. 'Cause ow.
Once upon a time, a blog was started at AOL Journals. The scales fell from the eyes of The Creator and it was moved to Wordpress. Then Journals tanked and all old posts were moved here for safekeeping.
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6 comments:
News must have got to NY, b/c I heard it was cool to have cream cheese on your nose. What in the hell is wrong with people, why wouldnt someone tell you if you had food on your face? Something like that happened to me a while back. I went into a meeting at a school with my skirt tucked in to my pantyhose and I did not have any underwear on....They let me walk around showing my ass to all the kids. I heard that the Dept. of Psych is a lot busier now.
Have a good day! It sounds like you are a nice person.
Last time I got stung by a wasp, I called Brent to see if poisonous snakes live in Ohio... because obviously I'd been bitten. I couldn't believe that a lil' wasp stinger could cause so much pain. And two? God, Deana, just go to the freaking ER. Check yourself in for a day because you earned it.
My kids all want to know why I laughing so hard. Between the cream cheese and the comment about the skirt in the pantihose... Geez... THAT is freaking funny!! Tomorrow you should go into the school wearing a button that says something wickedly clever.
I think I shall follow Andi's advice. "Hello, I was stung by a wasp, twice, 4 days ago. It now itches a LOT. All that will help is an adjustable bed, a TV on the wall, and hospital grilled cheese. Keep 'em coming."
Oh Lord, I most certainly would've told you about the cream cheese nose. A real friend will always let you know when there is food in your teeth. Or on your nose. Or whatever inappropriate place you may have smeared food. (By the way, my Juliana wants to know if you took a picture of the cream cheese on your nose!)
I got stung by a bee on my foot last fall and did it ever hurt. I think if I'd put on a pair of Wasp Pants, I would have stayed in a bathrobe for the rest of my life.
OW! lol OW!
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