My life as a 12 year old girl

So I saw that stupid Harry Potter movie.  I made the mistake of rereading Order of the Phoenix too close to seeing the movie.  I'm reasonably certain it sucked anyway, but having been that close to the book made it extra painful.  I went to see it with Julianna, my friend Bev and her two oldest girls, and an extra 10 year old.  Bev and the extra kid hadn't read the book recently (kid hadn't read it at all).  They were not party to the outraged squawking that characterized the drive home.  I, however, was in full angry-fan mode.  "But what about the..."  "And the...!!!"  "I KNOW!!"  "And there was no...!!!"  It's a wonder none of us stroked out.

First, and most trivially, the effects were terrible.  This wouldn't matter if the movie were good, but it wasn't, so they sucked.  Grawp, the giant, was just wrong and awful and meh.   I will admit that the too short battle at the end between Dumbledore and Voldemort (don't flinch!) was pretty cool.  I'm gonna miss ol' Dumbledore.

Of course much of the story was dropped.  Understandable, the book was the size of a paving slab.  But for the last movie, they did a good job of it. They just focused on the Tri-Wizard Tournament and dropped everything else.  Fine.  So there was no S.P.E.W, but I let it go b/c they had a coherent story to tell.  This one?  I cannot imagine how it made even a little sense if you hadn't read the book.  Huge chunks of plot were missing and what WAS there seemed to be on fast-forward.  There were so many characters that few got any screen time.  Only Harry and Umbridge (great casting btw.  I wanted to set her on fire, so she did a great job) get much more than a few lines.  Oh, and Daniel?  Please stop building up your neck muscles.  It's too close in size to your head and you are being to resemble a bespectacled penis. 

I felt that what was important about OotP was the mental connection between Harry and Voldemort.  Occlumency, Legilimency, the Prophecy.  Instead, the focus was almost solely on Umbridge's tenure at Hogwarts-- her growing power and ultimate downfall.  That story should be the backdrop against which Harry's interactions with Snape and realizations of his father's fallibility should have been played.  Instead, the Occlumency lessons are a throw away, and the introduction of James-as-asshat hardly noticeable.  The other major theme--that makes the whole Umbridge thing possible, really--is the adolescence of Harry and pals.  The ANGST! as the girls kept shouting.  Harry sets himself apart from everyone, foreshadowing how he will have to go it alone in the new book...Crap. I just turned into an English major.  Sorry.  Anyway. Because he's decided he's all misunderstood (what 14 year old isn't, pal, get over yourself), he won't go to Dumbledore for help.   The movie did address the Cho Chang infatuation, but having her betray Dumbledore's Army was just wrong.  Luna Lovegood was terrific, but the whole thread about The Quibbler was dropped.  And...NO QUIDDITCH.  Hello?  Lifetime ban for Harry, Fred, and George (oh, yummy, yummy twins)? hrmpf.

So it's over two hours long, but too short by half to tell the story properly.  A&E or BBC need to do a miniseries of each book.  Using children who can actually act this time, please.  Meanwhile, I have to go re-read The Half Blood Prince in preparation for Saturday's read-o-rama.  yay!